{"id":3586,"date":"2015-06-24T16:12:09","date_gmt":"2015-06-24T20:12:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/66.147.242.160\/~stumbli4\/?p=3586"},"modified":"2015-06-24T16:12:09","modified_gmt":"2015-06-24T20:12:09","slug":"francischurch-check-your-catholic-procreation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/?p=3586","title":{"rendered":"FrancisChurch: Check Your Catholic Procreation"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Irresponsible<\/a>

Irresponsible sins against nature?<\/p><\/div>\n

It’s amazing how much sheer anti-Catholic material is being set up for that awful upcoming Synod.\u00a0 Responsible procreation?<\/a>\u00a0 Hasn’t the entire Catholic world including His Holiness Francis just told us the new Catholic earth-ism has nothing whatsoever to do with population control?<\/p>\n

In Chicago, as Frank Sinatra pointed out, men dance with their wives.<\/p>\n

Sometimes that leads to other things.<\/p>\n

In the great movie Rob Roy<\/a>, one of\u00a0the Catholic Highlanders tells this joke at a\u00a0celebration:<\/p>\n

Q: Why are Calvinists against making love standing up?<\/p>\n

A: It might lead to dancing.<\/p>\n

Last night I danced with my wife.<\/p>\n

Is it always “procreation” or is it only procreation if you find out later that it was?<\/p>\n

In any case, I didn’t think about it. Even once. I\u00a0don’t think she did either.<\/p>\n

I went to work without feeling guilty. As I remember, I bought a cup of coffee and a donut.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

That’s your first mistake right there, Mr. Mahound.\u00a0 In FrancisChurch you’re supposed to feel guilty about that kind of thing.\u00a0 Also, dancing is sexist and coffee and donuts pollute your inner ecosystem so that’s two other sins right there, maybe three.\u00a0 Remember, in terms of the Earth (which is of course oriented toward God), we’re all one and responsible for each other.\u00a0 So can that donut NewCatholic!<\/p>\n

Of course, I’m thinking about this against the background of the recently released Instrumentum Laboris of the Synod<\/a> (on the Family). One of the Agenda Items is “responsible procreation.”<\/p>\n

I’ve read that in the early Medieval Church, sometimes it was thought necessary to confess if you had romantic feelings for, and acted on them with, your spouse.\u00a0Unless of course you had no\u00a0romantic feelings and were just doing your duty to populate the earth or whatever.<\/p>\n

Now (it seems) you have to confess if you only<\/i> had romantic feelings and were not\u00a0dutifully thinking of the effects of acting on those feelings on, say, future carbon emissions.<\/p>\n

We’ve come full circle,\u00a0sort of.<\/p>\n

Okay, so I’ve always wanted to say this:<\/p>\n

Hands off my body.<\/p>\n

Hands off my wife’s body.<\/p>\n

And hands off, well, you know.<\/p>\n

We’ll procreate however we damn well want.<\/p>\n

Another item on the Synod agenda is “birth reduction.”<\/p>\n

I know. I did a double-take on that\u00a0one too. No doubt there will be more to say about it later. But for now, this will merely have to do:<\/p>\n

Hands off my (future) ten-seat van with the Pro-Life stickers…<\/p>\n

…you nasty heretical freaks.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Careful.\u00a0 Your individualism is showing.\u00a0 There’s no Hell, but if there was it would be for you selfish types who sin against creation, careless of your neighbor.<\/p>\n

At least there can be earthly demerits and penalties established by committee with the help of business leaders<\/a>.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Read the rest here<\/a>.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s amazing how much sheer anti-Catholic material is being set up for that awful upcoming Synod.\u00a0 Responsible procreation?\u00a0 Hasn’t the entire Catholic world including His Holiness Francis just told us the new Catholic earth-ism has nothing whatsoever to do with population control? In Chicago, as Frank Sinatra pointed out, men dance with their wives. Sometimes …<\/span> Read More →<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[507,493,508,506,96],"class_list":["post-3586","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-family","tag-instrumentum-laboris","tag-mahound","tag-procreation","tag-synod"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3586","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3586"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3586\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3601,"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3586\/revisions\/3601"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3586"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3586"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stumblingblock.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3586"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}