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DEATHMONEY: EVIL DISNEY INC. KICKS IN 5 MILLION FOR THE NEW NOTRE DAME

MAGISTER ON THE DOUBLE-POPE CHURCH: FRANCIS’S REACTION TO THE WAYWARD BENEDICTBOT’S PERVCHURCH ‘NOTES’ NOT ONE OF SUPPORT

BP. SCHNEIDER: NOTRE DAME WAS A CALL TO REPENTANCE FOR FIFTY YEARS OF CHURCH BURNING, OF PERVCHURCH CRIMES BY THOSE WHO REJECT THE BENEDICTBOT’S IDEAS. IF THOSE SHEPHERDS REFUSE TO DO PENANCE, WHO KNOW?  AN EARTHQUAKE MAY DESTROY ST. PETERS!

VOX CANTORIS: HAPPY BIRTHDAY POPE BENEDICT XVI. MAY YOU LIVE MANY MORE YEARS IN ORDER TO TESTIFY TO THE TRUTH OF WHAT HAPPENED AND TAKE BACK THE THRONE FROM WHICH YOU WERE PUSHED.

ARLINGTON DIOCESE ‘S FATHER RONALD S. ESCALANTE, RAILROADED WITH PERVCHARGE AFTER CATCHING SCAM ARTIST EMPLOYEE

SWEDISH GLOBAL WARMING PROPAGANDA STUNT TEENAGER, GRETA, MEETS WITH GLOBAL WARMING PROPAGANDA STUNT POPE, FRANCIS

DR. PHIL FRANCIS PAINTS THE PASSION OF CHRIST AS SOME SORT OF EXTROVERTED ACCEPTANCE OF ‘RELATIONSHIP AND ENTRUSTMENT’ WITH ‘THE OTHER’

MAUNDY THURSDAY: WILL FRANCIS JUMP FROM THE HOLY POPEMOBILE TO WASH SOME COW’S HOOVES THIS YEAR?

UNINSPIRING COMMUNIST, PHILIPPINE FRANCIS, CD. TAGLE TO KIDS: RICH PEOPLE ARE USUALLY LOW-LIFES!

FAUX-CONSERVATIVE FRANCISCATHOLIC AND TRAITOROUS ELITE, PAUL RYAN, JOINS FACULTY OF EVIL NOTRE DAME U.

EMOTIONLESS POP-CULTURE GROUPIE, CD. RAVASI EMITS BORG-SPEAK AT NOTRE DAME SHOCKED: “I WAS STRUCK IN AN EVOCATIVE WAY BY THE MANY PARISIANS AND TOURISTS WHO WERE FILMED CRYING BEFORE THIS SPECTACLE

FRENCH MINISTER OF CULTURE: IT WOULD TAKE A PARTICULARLY LARGE HEAT LOAD TO START A CONFLAGRATION LIKE THAT

COMPANY WHO WORKING ON NOTRE RESTORATION CONFIRMS: THERE WAS NO WELDING GOING ON AT THE TIME. THERE WERE NO ‘HOT SPOTS’

NOTRE DAME: THE HIGH ALTAR INTACT, THE FRANCISALTAR CRUSHED.