PORTENTOUS SIGN: COVID CASES SPIKE IN A DOZEN STATES WITH HIGH VACCINATION RATES WHICH MAY SIGNAL A FEARED HEALTH CATASTROPHE
SHEA, EDEN, AND FRANCISCHURCH: ASSIMILATED BY THE BORG
NEVER WORK FOR THE CHURCH, IT COULD DESTROY YOUR FAITH
NEVERTRUMP ‘CONSERVATIVE’ HERO, BEN SHAPIRO, WANTS TO MANDATE THE DEATHVAXX
MEET THE OKLAHOMA CHURCH LADY WHO DRESSES UP FOR VIRTUAL SERVICES?!
VATICAN: SALARIES OF CARDINALS AND DEPARTMENT HEADS CUT DUE TO HOLY SCAMDEMIC
NY: SCAMDEMIC LEADING TO INCREASE IN PERMANENT CLOSURES OF CATHOLIC SCHOOLS
“DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU SHOULD BE DOING THAT, MUNDABOR?” SAID NO WOMAN, EVER
MAGISTER ON THE CDF’S GAY BLESSING BAN: DOES OR DOES NOT FRANCIS SHARE THIS “RESPONSUM” OF THE CONGREGATION THAT WATCHES OVER THE CORRECT DOCTRINE OF THE CHURCH?
CANADIAN JESUITS ENDORSE SIN!
DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU SHOULD BE DOING THAT?
Here’s a fantastic satire recently posted on Eccles and Bosco:
“From now on visiting parties of pilgrims wishing to celebrate Mass are invited to do so in one of the following locations:
• The public conveniences;
• A disused broom cupboard;
• A cold area of the grotto under six inches of water.
•
• All Masses must be in Italian, and involve an idol of Pachamama, or they will be stopped. Anyone trying to offer a traditional Latin Mass will be escorted to the River Tiber and pushed in.
• The good news is that several slots are available: 3.23 a.m., 3.33 a.m., and 3.43 a.m. Each slot lasts ten minutes, so do practise speaking quickly, Fathers.
• On being told of these new regulations, Pope Francis laughed heartily for 20 minutes and then hastily composed himself and said “We must visit these poor oppressed pilgrims. Make sure they cough up 20 euros each, as the Vatican is rather broke at the moment, with the Roma Power Company threatening to cut off our electricity any time now. We do have our own dynamo, but little Ivereigh can’t keep running round in his wheel all night.”
• A papal visit to St Peter’s is not considered to be one of the more difficult tasks, involving just a ten-minute walk from the humble study in which the Pope works on developing his new doctrines. However, it has few photo-opportunities, and no racing around in a popemobile, let alone a chance for EX AEROPLANA announcements.
• Still, such a trip would be a very welcome boost to morale, and the pilgrims are grateful that a provisional date of March 13th 2043, the 30th anniversary of Francis’s accession, has been agreed.”