Leo the Worse, good moniker. You can also consider him the handmaid of the Francis. History will see them as Popes Pancho and Lefty.
The Charlotte Massacre.
Leo the Worse’s coat of arms has an interesting color scheme, surprised you didn’t mention that the predominant color is…(care to guess?)…aw, you got it!
Lavender!
Nice to hear that Leo the worse visits to Castle Gandolfo that has gone from the Vineyard of the Lord— Remember the vineyards there planted by Pope Benedict that anti-Pope Francis ripped out for pure spite —to the mansion of Al Gore.
I agree on one of your best headlines. Any man who can say this upon the election of Leo the Worse: “Then a soothing silence spread within me; I felt safe and secure,” has got to be gay. What Poof the World Over isn’t soothed, and feeling safe n sound with Leo’s tailwind?
So good to know the Leo has anti-Trad anti-drone capabilities built-in to the new 750,000 popemobile. Because you know when you just gotta get that Northern Peruvian goat in a hurry, it just may help to have a 600 horsepower SUV with anti drone systems for the bad neighborhoods; at least he’s a little more upfront—like Fr. Z. the Gourmand—about being a champagne liberal.
‘Cause Leo’s the rootin’-est, tootin’-est, trad-Mass shootin’est hombre this side of Sergio Leo-ne’s Spaghetti westerns.
Yea, the popemobile has to venture into neighborhoods where the muezzins, minarets and mosques mingle in order to secure the Leonine goat. Could be as dicey as Chartres in June.
Just the other day, Leo was thanking the crowd at St.John Lateran for “walking together” and urging them to keep on walking with him. It would have been the perfect time to launch a line of “Air Leo” designer footwear, cloud sole[soul] sneakers with extra fancy laces, or high tops monogrammed with the Leo Coat of Arms and crafted from environmentally responsible materials.
But, heck, why walk the Synodal Path when you can be carried along in style? Seems that Leo has moved from marathons to Mansory, famous creator of personalized automotive “masterpieces that defy convention.” A steal at half a million dollars, Mansory’s Speranza “luxury lounge on wheels” has four electric motors, anti-drone radar, 567 horsepower, goes from Zero to 62 mph in 4 seconds, and is sustainably “green” (294 miles on one charge).
But wait. If ostentatious mobility is your bag, Leo, then go see “Q.” Yes, a Bond car is so much better and badder: front-mounted rockets, reinflatable tires, flamethrowers in the exhaust pipes, smoke canisters, a safety ejector seat with parachute, and, in the unlikely event of a water landing, submarine conversion complete with periscope and torpedoes. Why settle for less?
Granted that Leo likes to dress and drive to impress. But the pricey protective gadgets on his new popemobile would be high on the D.O.V.E. (Department of Vatican Efficiency) list, if there were one. Not only would his purported gluttony for goat put Leo in no danger, but also it would make him welcome pretty much worldwide. Goat stew and kid kababs are popular in the Moslem Middle East and North Africa. Curried goat accompanied by a goat soup is a traditional dish in Caribbean and Latin American cultures. Likewise, Chinese and Filipino chefs also celebrate the goat at restaurants or the home.
Wondering if the new Peruvian cook will be keeping billy and nanny goats in the Vatican backyard. Of course, the danger (this time a real one) is that they’ll jump the fence and devour all the shrubs, ivy leaves, rosebushes; the Leo floral Coat of Arms will be the first to go!
Leo the Worse, good moniker. You can also consider him the handmaid of the Francis. History will see them as Popes Pancho and Lefty.
The Charlotte Massacre.
Leo the Worse’s coat of arms has an interesting color scheme, surprised you didn’t mention that the predominant color is…(care to guess?)…aw, you got it!
Lavender!
Nice to hear that Leo the worse visits to Castle Gandolfo that has gone from the Vineyard of the Lord— Remember the vineyards there planted by Pope Benedict that anti-Pope Francis ripped out for pure spite —to the mansion of Al Gore.
I agree on one of your best headlines. Any man who can say this upon the election of Leo the Worse: “Then a soothing silence spread within me; I felt safe and secure,” has got to be gay. What Poof the World Over isn’t soothed, and feeling safe n sound with Leo’s tailwind?
So good to know the Leo has anti-Trad anti-drone capabilities built-in to the new 750,000 popemobile. Because you know when you just gotta get that Northern Peruvian goat in a hurry, it just may help to have a 600 horsepower SUV with anti drone systems for the bad neighborhoods; at least he’s a little more upfront—like Fr. Z. the Gourmand—about being a champagne liberal.
‘Cause Leo’s the rootin’-est, tootin’-est, trad-Mass shootin’est hombre this side of Sergio Leo-ne’s Spaghetti westerns.
Hold the Duck.
🙂
Hilarious, CP Benischek!
Yea, the popemobile has to venture into neighborhoods where the muezzins, minarets and mosques mingle in order to secure the Leonine goat. Could be as dicey as Chartres in June.
Just the other day, Leo was thanking the crowd at St.John Lateran for “walking together” and urging them to keep on walking with him. It would have been the perfect time to launch a line of “Air Leo” designer footwear, cloud sole[soul] sneakers with extra fancy laces, or high tops monogrammed with the Leo Coat of Arms and crafted from environmentally responsible materials.
But, heck, why walk the Synodal Path when you can be carried along in style? Seems that Leo has moved from marathons to Mansory, famous creator of personalized automotive “masterpieces that defy convention.” A steal at half a million dollars, Mansory’s Speranza “luxury lounge on wheels” has four electric motors, anti-drone radar, 567 horsepower, goes from Zero to 62 mph in 4 seconds, and is sustainably “green” (294 miles on one charge).
But wait. If ostentatious mobility is your bag, Leo, then go see “Q.” Yes, a Bond car is so much better and badder: front-mounted rockets, reinflatable tires, flamethrowers in the exhaust pipes, smoke canisters, a safety ejector seat with parachute, and, in the unlikely event of a water landing, submarine conversion complete with periscope and torpedoes. Why settle for less?
Granted that Leo likes to dress and drive to impress. But the pricey protective gadgets on his new popemobile would be high on the D.O.V.E. (Department of Vatican Efficiency) list, if there were one. Not only would his purported gluttony for goat put Leo in no danger, but also it would make him welcome pretty much worldwide. Goat stew and kid kababs are popular in the Moslem Middle East and North Africa. Curried goat accompanied by a goat soup is a traditional dish in Caribbean and Latin American cultures. Likewise, Chinese and Filipino chefs also celebrate the goat at restaurants or the home.
Wondering if the new Peruvian cook will be keeping billy and nanny goats in the Vatican backyard. Of course, the danger (this time a real one) is that they’ll jump the fence and devour all the shrubs, ivy leaves, rosebushes; the Leo floral Coat of Arms will be the first to go!
https://factcheck.afp.com/doc.afp.com.48HX3T2
Thank you for all the light you shed on the state of our entrusted clerics.
“Sipping tea, drinking whiskey and smoking cigarettes “….oh the imagery!!!!!🤣
Poor wheelchair pusher!